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Reference don't shape you, but the interpretation we give it.
I will never get over them; I will always have pain. Been broken in a relationship? You are absolutely right, as long as you hold on to the belief that you have been taken advantage of, or that you have lost something that can never be returned, you will indeed always have the pain. Just remember, Loss is imaginary. Nothing ever disappears in the universe ; it only changes form.
heechai