20 days of unstoppable learning! Hope you guys are enjoying the learning as much as i do! So today we will be on chapter 3 of Getting To Yes! 10 points lets go!
1. 2 man quarreling in a library, one wants the window open and the other wants it closed. They bicker back and forth about how much to leave it open, a crack, half way, three quarters of the way. No solution satisfies them both. Enter the librarian. She asked one why he wants the window open “to get some fresh air” she asks the other why he wants it closed “to avoid the draft” after thinking a minute, she open wide a window in the next room, bringing in fresh air without a draft. For a wise solution reconcile interests, not positions.
2. The story about is a very common situation in negotiation where both party are not clear on the interests but focusing on the position of the window. No one would have been able to solve this problem if the librarian focus on the position too.
3. Interests define the problem. The basic problem in a negotiation lies not in conflicting positions, but in the conflict between each side’s needs, desires, concerns, and fears.
4. Behind opposed position lie shared and compatible interests, as well as conflicting ones. Like in a interest of a tenant vs landlord. Both want stability. The landlord wants a stable tenant; the tenant wants a permanent address. The shared interest being know may lead to a negotiation which results to a long lease, an agreement to share the cost of improving the apartment and efforts by both parties to accommodate each other in the interest of a good relationship.
5. To understand what interest they are in. Always ask yourself why when the other party takes a position. Why does the landlord prefer to fix the rent in a five year instead of one by one?
6. The most powerful interests are basic human needs. In searching for the basic interests behind a declared position, look particularly for those bedrock concerns that motivate all people. If you can take care of such basic needs, you increase the chance both of reaching agreement and, if an agreement is reached, of the other side’s keeping to it. Basic human needs include:
- economic well being
- a sense of belonging
- control over one’s life
7. Acknowledge their interests as part of the problem. Each of us tends to be so concerned with his or her own interests that we pay too little heed to the interest of others. People listen better if they feel that you have understood them.
8. Put the problem before your answer. If you tell them your answer first they may feel defensive and will not want to listen and start attacking you back. However if you want some one to listen and understand your reasoning, give your interests and reasoning first and your conclusions or proposals later. Tell the company first about the dangers they are creating then they will listen carefully.
9. Be concrete but flexible, you wanna know where you are going and yet be open to fresh ideas! To avoid having to make a difficult decision on what to settle for, people will often go into a negotiation with no plan other than to sit down with the other side and see what they offer or demand. An open mind is not a empty mind.
10. Be hard on the problem, soft on the people. It is not wise to commit yourself to your position but it is wise to commit to your interest. Often the wisest solutions, those that produce the maximum gain for you at the minimum cost to the other side, are produced only by strongly advocating your interests.
Tell us how you are able to apply these negotiation skills in your daily life or if it had impacted you in the comments below! Stay strong, Take Charge!
As always the book you can purchase it from the link below!